The Curse of an Itch Witch

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Volumes upon volumes have been written on the Magicks of the varying kinds of witches; the most huggable of dolls made by stitch witches, the worst of the literally cutting remarks of the bitch witches, the unbeatable Celeste Any% PBs of the Twitch witches, but precious little is known by most of the itch witches.

Despite that, let it never be said that an itch witch's powers seem unimpressive or useless. That goes double if one is in earshot. For while those Magicks may not be the most suited to dollcraft or speedrunning, should an itch witch chance upon such a conversation, the curse they'd unleash has no equal.

Sure, a switch witch might ensure you end up in some very embarrassing situations. A hitch witch might hook you up with the ex of your nightmares. A ĝ̷͇͂͒͘l̶͙͇̼̹̀̈́i̵̻̯͔͋̽̀͝t̴̮̼͑͒̀ͅc̸̫̺̜̿̄̀h̸̥̰͙̊ w̶̮̳̜͕̏̈́i̸̟̓ṯ̸̢̧̰̚c̵̩̀h̴̺͍̭̝̀͋̃ might █l̷̞̓e̷̽͜█ŝ̸̮███é̸̪l̶̩͘p̷̝̒██e̸̲̎.

But the curse of an itch witch is more frightful still.

You see, it starts as just a tickle. You may even laugh, thinking it just further proves your point about itch witches. But those first few scratches will feel oh… so… good. You'll hardly be able to stop yourself. And that's the best part; the curse's most insidious feature.

For every scratch, it learns. For every twinge, it evolves. For every new technique you develop to fend it off, it will find another, harder to reach spot to infest. You are nothing but a puzzle for the curse to solve and your agony is the answer it inexorably pursues.

How long can you hold off scratching, so as to slow the curse's progress? Once you give in, how willing are you to scratch inappropriate places in front of friends, peers, and colleagues? Exactly how low on your back can you reach unassisted?

What will you do when the curse realizes that your insides can itch? How bloody raw will you scrape yourself, trying to get just those precious few millimeters deeper into the meat of your calf? When your nails fall off and your teeth can't reach, how "useless" will you look?

Tell me… what implement do you think you'll reach for once the curse is in your eyes and bowels? No answer…? Well… I look forward to seeing what you choose.

End 🧵